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Sunday, March 30, 2014

Don’t Avoid Inevitable Interactions

Let’s pretend that you and "Sally" both work in the same Shipping & Receiving Department. She frequently gets under your skin. If you could press a button to ship her to another department, it would have been done five years ago. The problem is, no such button exists, and there’s no chance of change. To add fuel to the fire, your boss has just given you and Sally a large project to work on together. She suggests meeting for lunch to talk about the next steps, and you generate a fast list of reasons why you can’t make it. You have officially brushed Sally off. Now what? Unfortunately, you’re still at square one (that’s what), and you still have the project and have to figure out how to work together. This is when relationship management skills are absolutely necessary, because though you might not choose a friendship with this person, you and Sally are now responsible for the same project. Here’s a basic strategy for work with Sally: 1. Do not avoid her or the situation. Accept it and make the choice to use your EQ skills to move forward with her. 2. You’ll need to watch your emotions and make careful decisions about how to manage those emotions. Since you’re not in this alone, conjure up your social awareness skills to being Sally into the fold and put yourself in her shoes. 3. Meet with her to learn about what experience she has to offer and her preferences for working with you on this project. Observe her body language and see how she responds to you. Maybe you frustrate her just as much! This may hurt a little, but you may actually lay the groundwork for a working relationship. 4. Share your preferences for managing the project and come to an agreement. You don’t need to tell Sally that you don’t care for her. Instead, you can share with her that you’d prefer to work independently on separate parts of the project and meet along the way to ensure you’re both on track. 5. If Sally agrees, your work process has been hammered out. If she doesn’t agree, it’s time to apply more self-management and social awareness skills until you reach an agreement. 6. If you get frustrated along the way (and chances are you will), ask yourself why and decide how to manage yourself. Loop back with Sally at your next meeting and remind yourselves of the goals of the project. At the end of the project, find a way to acknowledge what you both accomplished together. Do you have difficulty working with some people? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

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