A Tribute to My Dad & The Difference He Has Made

To my dad, who passed away at 1pm EST on December 24th: Dad, all too often we do not pause to tell those we love what we appreciate most about them. This tribute attempts to explain how you have taught me so many things through your life and your words, and how these values will impact my children and hopefully many generations to come. I remember Cedar Lake and a 24” rainbow trout you caught late one evening after a long day of fishing. You taught me the value of patience. You taught me perseverance and persistence while hunting for grouse in the backwoods of places like Colville and Kettle Falls, not to mention elk hunting in the foothills of the Cascade Mountains during cold November snows. You taught me to be industrious and to avoid laziness as I watched you working around the house: planting, weeding, and harvesting your garden, building the garage, digging a swimming pool, constructing a fishpond, and building another exit from our basement. These and other activities like painting the house, changing the oil in the Galaxy 500, putting on snow tires, and giving the Bronco a much needed tune-up helped to prepare me for life with basic home maintenance skills. Also, as I watched you arrange your tools in the garage, you taught me organizational skills, which I use in my work to this very day. You showed me resourcefulness, inventiveness, and creativity as I watched you repair washers and dryers and almost anything that broke down around our home. In this way, you also modeled being thrifty and being a good steward by teaching me the value of making things last - not throwing them away while they still had a useful life. As I helped you fix up the lake cabin (putting in indoor plumbing, remodeling the kitchen, and constructing the pump house) you taught me the importance of self-discipline and delayed gratification – learning to wait for the greater reward. But you were not all work either. You taught me the value of having fun as we panned for gold in Sheep Creek, explored old ghost towns of the great Northwest, took driving vacations to Oklahoma (especially the one down the coast of California), watched “Gun Smoke” & “Bonanza” over TV dinners, made Saturday morning grocery runs and trips to the Wonder Bread store, went on our annual outing to the Ice Capades at Christmas time (even though you hated crowds), joined the IOF Forester rifle team at the armory, and cheered wildly during New Years Day football games. Your preparation for camping, fishing, and hunting helped to teach me the importance of always being prepared for anything that might come your way – something I really appreciated when I went on my winter survival campout with the Boy Scouts. You also taught me the significance of leaving a place better than you found it. And as I’ve grown I’ve learned both of these principals apply to relationships as well as campgrounds. You showed me the commitment and dedication you had to our family as you switched to the day shift so I could see you when you got home. How I appreciated that. You were a fine protector and provider – for your family as well as your animals. You always made sure we were well cared for and had all of our needs fulfilled, even if it meant that you went without. In this way, you taught me the value of servant-leadership. You were trustworthy and dependable, as was demonstrated in your punctuality (I never really remember you being late). You were reliable, you always seemed to make good on your word. You were an honest man, well respected in the community. You taught me the value of the truth. You also taught me the importance of lending a helping hand to those in need as I watched you help the neighbors by shoveling their snow, mowing their lawns, watering their flowers, and watching their homes while they were away on vacation. But your helpfulness to others did not come before your family. You were always available to help me with school projects. I’ll never forget my papier-mache volcano, or my electro-magnetic motor, or my see-through graph paper for scaling map drawings. Perhaps there are three values you taught me that I treasure above all else. First, you taught me to believe in myself and to believe in the good in others. You taught me that I could be anything I wanted to be, if I would just apply myself. You believed in me. All you asked is that I always do my best in whatever I did; that always I give it my very best effort. Second, you taught me unconditional love. No matter what I did, I knew I could always come home, that I was welcome and loved there. And even though you might not have agreed with the timing and circumstances surrounding my decision to get married, you accepted Martha like she was your own child. You never once made her feel anything but unconditional love and acceptance. Third, you helped to instill within me a steadfast faith in God. Although you were not a church-going man, you always made sure I was there whenever the church doors were open and you encouraged me to be active in my Christian life. It has now become apparent to me that the older I get, the wiser you become. Not that you were not wise all along, quite the contrary. I simply appreciate your very practical wisdom more every year. I have many other enjoyable memories of growing up as a member of the Songer family at West 604 Barnes Road, but there is not enough room to even begin to list them all here. So I have chosen only those that seemed to impact my character the most. As you can plainly see dad, you really have made a difference in my life. Any success that I enjoy in life I owe, in large part, to you and your faithfulness to bring me up “in the way I should go”. I hope I pass on to my children the many values you have built into my life. I love you, dad. Comment below or email me directly at curtis.songer@gmail.com