Is Your Boss Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde Today?

Ever have an exceptionally moody boss? You never know if the “good boss” or the “evil boss” is going to show up for work – will it be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde today? Here’s how one person learned to deal with the issue: If there was a problem at work that needed the attention of the moody boss, this person would add that to a running list of issues he needed help with, then take it to the weekly staff meeting. Being very careful to never sit next to the moody boss, he had a chance to observe how the boss treated others as discussions went from person to person around the table during the staff meeting. After the boss had talked to two or three other staff members during the meeting, this person could accurately gauge the mood of the boss. If he was in a bad mood, he would keep the list to himself and save it for another day. If he was in a good mood, he would try to get the boss to address as many issues as possible in that meeting. The problem was, this employee sometimes had to hold his list for 5 of 6 weeks at a time until the boss’ mood was right. This often led to a delay in resolving some important issues. The good news is that the employee rarely, if ever, got ripped into. A Yiddish proverb states, “If you act like an ass, don’t get insulted if people ride you like one.” Consistency doesn’t come natural to everyone. In fact, nobody is consistently consistent. Aldous Huxley once said, “Consistency is contrary to nature, contrary to human life. The only completely consistent people are the dead.” If you want to be the kind of leader others want to follow, then you’ll have plan and fight to be consistent. This will help you to be seen by others as approachable. Even if you care for people, are honest with them, and can perform your job well, people will not depend on you and will not trust you unless you are consistent and committed. People admire people who exhibit great commitment. Think of some of the great leaders you admire. When I think of those I admire one of the first qualities that comes to my mind is their commitment - commitment to their cause and commitment to their principles. They’ve given everything they have to leading according to their principles. One of the greatest challenges is to lead without a leadership position. Consistency and commitment increase our ability to lead others, even if we are not in the leadership position. And at its purest form, that’s what true leadership is – influence – nothing more, nothing less. The whole secret is to think influence and not position. Do you desire to become a more consistent and committed leader? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@truthatlife.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

The Difference Between Character, Confidence, & Competence

Thomas Paine once said, “I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death.” What gives the leader the strength to exhibit such admirable qualities? The answer is character. We tend to put a lot of emphasis on intelligence and skill in this country. And while those things are important, they cannot substitute for strong character. Trust is the foundation of leadership. A leader who understood all too well how character issues impact leadership is Chuck Colson, the former Nixon aide who was imprisoned in the wake of the Watergate scandal. Colson turned his life around after that ordeal and subsequently lectured on leadership and faith issues. He said, “As you go through life, whether it’s in the military, in your business, in the church, in your family, or whatever walk of life, someone is going to depend on your character more than upon your IQ.” There are far too many middle leaders who don’t live by the character code of top leadership. They think they don’t have to live that way until they become the top (visible) leader. The fact is that if they don’t live by that code now, they are less likely to ever become the top leader. And if they ever do, they probably won’t live by that code then. But if they choose to limit their freedoms now, they will learn the sacrifices of the position they one day desire to possess. If you desire to be a great leader, then develop and exhibit the kind of character that you would find admirable in a top leader. That will pave the way for relationships with other leaders today and prepare you for non-positional leadership. Respect is almost always gained on difficult ground. A leadership position will help a leader only until difficulties arise. Then the leader must arise to meet those difficulties. Leaders who are incapable of meeting challenges may desire respect from their followers and peers, but they rarely get it. They may be liked if they possess good character and care for others, but they won’t be highly respected. People may treat them kindly, but they won’t listen to them. It has been said, “Everyone may have the right to speak, but not everyone has earned the right to be heard.” While poor leaders demand respect, competent leaders have earned respect. Being able to do a job well brings a leader credibility. If you think you can do a job, that’s confidence. If you actually can do it, that’s competence. Do you desire to become a person of greater character, competence, or confidence? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@truthatlife.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Extending the Workshops Designed to Help Your Teen Identify their Life Calling, Career, & College

Due to extremely popular demand, we have extended our new series of free information sessions to Help Your Teen Identify their Life Calling, Career, & College. These sessions are of tremendous value in helping your teen identify their life purpose, how that maps to their career calling, improving their confidence and self-esteem, and making them better decision makers. Summer is a great time for your student to focus on these topics! The local free information sessions will be ideal for anyone you may know who may be one of the following situations: 1. You have many talents & aren’t sure what to do with them. 2. You're stressed about feeling a lack of direction and purpose. 3. The school aptitude test told you to go into a career that you’re not interested in. 4. You’re headed to college in the next year, but don’t know what to major in. 5. You're already at college and are considering changing your major. 6. You’ve graduated from college and think you may have made a mistake. 7. You're just starting out and need guidance in getting started in your career. Parents who have attended these sessions say the program has saved them over $20,000 per child! Come and see how. The “Help Your Teen Identify their Life Calling, Career, & College” sessions will be held at the following times and locations. Please help me spread the word! Panera Bread, 4172 William Penn Highway, Monroeville, June 19 at 6pm; Panera Bread, 12071 Perry Hwy, Wexford, PA 15090, June 23 at 6pm; Panera Bread, 12071 Perry Hwy, Wexford, PA 15090, June 26 at 6pm. For more information call or email Curtis Songer at curtis.songer@truthatlife.com or 248-396-6255

Become a Person of Influence

Leading others beyond your position is not easy. If real leadership were easy, everybody would excel at it. Most good leaders believe in themselves and their leadership ability. They are confident that if others would follow them, then the team would benefit and accomplish its goals. So why don’t people follow them? Because they don’t have to. Leadership is influence. If you have neither position nor influence, people will not follow you. And the further outside your organization they are, the less likely they are to let you lead them. That’s why you need to work hard to change your thinking from “I want a position that will make people follow me, to I want to become a person whom people will want to follow.” It’s a fallacy to believe that people would automatically follow you if you were the positional leader. Leaders who have actually been on the top know it doesn’t work that way. Do people follow you know? If they follow you today, then they will follow you tomorrow when you have a better (different) position. But if people don’t follow you where you are currently, then they won’t follow you where you are going either. The only solution to the Influence Challenge is to become the kind of leader other people want to follow. The following lesson illustrates what kind of person that typically is. Many people try to motivate/manipulate others by criticizing them or trying to exercise their power over them. People generally respond by becoming defensive, behaving combatively, or isolating themselves. It has been said, “You cannot antagonize and influence someone at the same time.” If leaders care about each individual as a person, then people respond well to them. The greater the depth of their concern, the broader and longer lasting their influence. Bo Schembechler, the former head coach of the University of Michigan football team said, “Deep down, your players must know that you care about them. This is the most important thing. I could never get away with what I do if the players felt I didn’t care. They know, in the long run, I’m in their corner.” People can sense how you feel about them. They can tell the difference between leaders who are using them for their own gain (manipulators) and those who want to help them succeed (motivators). People warm up to warm people. Once they get to know the heart of someone who cares, they respond well to them. Think of it this way: second mile leaders produce second mile followers. If you go out of your way to care about others and help them, then they will go out of their way to help you when you ask them to. Do you desire to become a person of greater influence? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@truthatlife.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

We See It When We Believe It!

We have all heard “I will believe it when I see it.” Try turning this around: We see it when we believe it. We experience it when we live it in the now. We call to our existence exactly what we are thinking and feeling and believing in the moment. Contemplate this: What am I calling into my life right now? What conscious and subconscious programs am I running on right now? What mental and emotional baggage am I clinging to? Is my life half-empty, or half-full? More importantly, what is even “in the glass” and how long have I been holding on to it? What if I chose to find and embrace the silver linings, the life lessons in disguise? Whether you reach success or failure in life has little to do with your circumstances; it has much more to do with your attitude, with your faithful courage, and with your choices. You see, non-achievers blame their circumstances; winners rise above their circumstances. Some concentrate on the blank wall that boxes them in; winners always look for a way to get under it, over it, around it, or through it. You must surround yourself with positive influences. When you are surrounded by negative thinkers, images, or materials, it is easy to get bogged down in hopelessness. Read inspiring books and magazines. Listen to motivational recordings and speakers. Attend positive-thinking seminars or programs. Make it a point to read or watch or listen to something positive and inspiring at least once every day. Focus on your strengths instead of your weaknesses. Learn to leverage your strengths in all dimension of your life: personal, family, faith, vocation, and community. Associate with positive people. Look for friends who feel good about themselves, people who have the attitude of gratitude. People who need to tear down others are not happy with themselves and are not good for you or your attitude. Life should be an adventure, to be savored from beginning to end. It is a game of constantly changing odds, constantly developing challenges, constantly opening opportunities. To win it, you have to play it. Sitting on the sidelines won’t do. Even after you’ve achieved all you ever hoped to achieve, it’s no time to stop living. Do you need assistance developing a more positive attitude? Have you maximized positivity in all areas of your life: personal, family, faith, vocation, and community? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@truthatlife.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Happy Father's Day 2014!

There is not more important job in all the world. It is the only leadership job where there is no back up person waiting to step in behind you. Your Heavenly Father is your model. Happy Father's Day & Many Blessings from Truth@Life! www.truthatlife.com

To Get a Promotion - Be A Leader (Part 2)

Continued from yesterday... If you want a promotion, you must be a leader. There are 20 principles & qualities that can make anyone a great leader - if they learn & apply them. In addition to the reality of constancy (see "To Get a Promotion" - Part 1), when studying leadership it is important to keep the following facts in mind: 1. While not everyone is a born leader, anyone can become a great leader. 2. Leadership principles can be learned. Some are easier to understand and apply than others, but every one of them can be learned. 3. Leadership principles can stand alone. Each principle compliments all the others, but you don’t need one in order to learn another. 4. Leadership principles carry consequences with them. Apply the principles and people will follow you. Violate or ignore them, and you will not be able to lead others. 5. Leadership principles are only the foundation of leadership. Once you learn the principles, you have to practice and apply them to your life in order to master leadership. Reiterating from earlier: Sociologists say that even introverted people will influence an average of 10,000 people in their lifetime – think about it. Someone who is not even trying to lead others will impact many – whether for good or bad. Just think about what one person can do if he or she is intentional about leading. What kind of impact potential exists inside of you? So where do most people go to learn leadership? The answer to that question today is that they search in many places. Some examine the world of politics. Other seek models in the entertainment industry. Still others turn to the world of business. Most people seem to look to successful CEOs, management consultants, and theoreticians with Ph.D.s to learn about leadership. But the truth is, the best source of leadership teaching today is the same as it has been for thousands of years. There are 10 core principles (processes) of leadership and 10 core qualities of great leaders. Learn and practice these and you will be a great leader. I have been a student of leadership principles most of my adult life, I have combined what I consider to be the 20 best works from the 10 best authors on the subject of leadership. In doing so I have also discovered how these basic leadership principles and qualities can be applied to over 80 leadership issues. These have been formulated into case studies, profiles, and lessons that can be immediately applied to your life. Is there a need for improved leadership skills in your life? Read more at http://www.truthatlife.com/. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. And for more info on how we can help, check out our new web site at http://truthatlife.com/

To Get a Promotion - Be A Leader

If you want a promotion, you must be a leader. There are 20 principles & qualities that can make anyone a great leader - if they learn & apply them. No one would deny that we have a leadership crisis in America today. It exists in most all spheres of our society: government, business, the family, and even the church. Everything rises and falls on leadership. More than anything else, the leadership of any group or organization (including families) will determine its success or failure. Everyone is a leader. Leadership is not just for a select few. Years ago, J. Oswald Sanders gave one of the best definitions of leadership ever written. He simply stated, “Leadership is influence.” And sociologists say that even introverted people will influence an average of 10,000 people in their lifetime! It doesn’t matter if you are a CEO or a stay-at-home mom, whether you are the parent of a family, the pastor of a church, and elected government official, an older brother or sister, the president of a company, or a potential leader for the next generation. So it is important to learn to become a better leader. The problem is that, if you are like most people, you may not wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and say, “Now, there’s an effective leader if ever I saw one!” Today, most people don’t believe they can make a positive impact on the world they live in. The truth is that few people are naturals when it comes to leading themselves or others. But everyone has leadership potential. You can become a better leader, regardless of your age, gender, marital status, or profession. The good news is that even though times change, technology marches forward, and cultures vary from place to place, leadership principles are unchanging. The true principles of leadership are constant – whether you are looking at the citizens of ancient Greece, the armies of the last 200 years, the rulers of modern Europe, famous heads of impactful families, or the business leaders of today’s global economy. Leadership principles stand the test of time – they are irrefutable. Is there a need for improved leadership skills in your life? Read more at http://www.truthatlife.com/. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. And for more info on how we can help, check out our new web site at http://truthatlife.com/

FREE Workshop to Help Your Teen Identify their Life Calling, Career, & College

If you are in the Pittsburgh area, we are now offering free information sessions to Help Your Teen Identify their Life Calling, Career, & College. These sessions are of tremendous value in helping your teen identify their life purpose, how that maps to their career calling, improving their confidence and self-esteem, and making them better decision makers. The local free information sessions will be ideal for anyone you may know who may be one of the following situations: 1. You have many talents & aren’t sure what to do with them. 2. You're stressed about feeling a lack of direction and purpose. 3. The school aptitude test told you to go into a career that you’re not interested in. 4. You’re headed to college in the next year, but don’t know what to major in. 5. You're already at college and are considering changing your major. 6. You’ve graduated from college and think you may have made a mistake. 7. You're just starting out and need guidance in getting started in your career. Parents who have attended these sessions say the program has saved them over $20,000 per child! Come and see how. The “Help Your Teen Identify their Life Calling, Career, & College” sessions will be held at the following times and locations. Please help me spread the word! Panera Bread, Oakland, 3800 Forbes Avenue, Oakland, PA, 5-June, 6pm; Panera Bread, Ross Park, 7217 McKnight Rd, Pittsburgh, PA, 9-June, 6pm; Panera Bread, Cranberry, 20111 Route 19, Cranberry Township, 12-June, 6pm; Panera Bread, Mt. Lebanon, 1500 Washington Road, Galleria Mall, 16-June, 6pm; Panera Bread, Monroeville, 4172 William Penn Highway, Monroeville, PA, 19-June, 6pm. For more information, go to http://www.truthatlife.com/ or contact: Curtis Songer, Principal, Truth@Life, Career Planning & Professional Development, curtis.songer@truthatlife.com, 248-396-6255.