Another Update from Curtis Songer - FREE Leadership & Professional Development Workshops

If you are in the Pittsburgh area, free information sessions over a two-week period to assist individuals with leadership and professional development. These will be ideal sessions for anyone interested in improving their skills professionally for career advancement and promotion opportunities. But these leadership skills also apply equally at home for being a better spouse, parent, or sibling. Sociologists tell us that we will all influence at least 10,000 people in our lifetime – so these influencing skills are critically important for everyone. The local free information sessions will be ideal for anyone you may know who may be one of the following situations: 1. Their talents are not utilized and they’re not as productive as they would like to be. 2. They are stressed & need better work/life balance. 3. Their present boss just doesn't understand them &/or they need to figure out how to get the next promotion. 4. They lack well-documented long-term goals that they consistently achieve. 5. There room for improvement in their relationships with their spouse, children, supervisor, and/or co-workers. 6. They have difficulty influencing and motivating others to their way of thinking. 7. Those who simply want to improve their leadership skills. The sessions will be held at the following times and locations. Please help me spread the word! Panera Bread, Oakland 3800 Forbes Avenue, Oakland, PA, 10-May @ 11am; Panera Bread, Ross Park 7217 McKnight Rd, Pittsburgh, PA, 12-May @ 6pm; Panera Bread, Cranberry 20111 Route 19, Cranberry Township, 14-May @ 6pm; Panera Bread, Mt. Lebanon 1500 Washington Road, Galleria Mall, 17-May @ 11am; Panera Bread, Monroeville 4172 William Penn Highway, Monroeville, PA, 19-May @ 6pm. For more information, contact: Curtis Songer Principal, Truth@Life Leadership & Professional Development 248-396-6255 curtis.songer@gmail.com

Want to Go Places (Part 3)?

It has been said, “The person who keeps busy helping the one who is below him, won’t have time to envy the person who is above him.” The right attitude is absolutely essential to contentment in the middle of an organization. Indeed, leadership is more about disposition than position. With the right attitude and the right skills, you can influence others from wherever you are in the organization. You can develop an attitude of contentment and fulfillment for where you are in the organization by doing the following five things... 1. Develop strong relationships with key people: It’s more important to get along with people than it is to get ahead of them. If you make it your goal to reach out to others and build relationships with them, you will derive fulfillment wherever you are. And whatever you do, don’t give up too easily on others if at first you don’t like them or easily connect with them. You may be surprised by how, over time, a potential adversary can become an ally. 2. Define wins in terms of teamwork: Legendary basketball coach John Wooden said, “The main ingredient of stardom is the rest of the team.” In other words, teamwork is what creates success, and we shouldn’t lose sight of that. One player may be crucial to a team but one player cannot make a team. When I think of someone who created a win using teamwork, I think of John Wooden. Anyone who values teamwork, and saw Wooden's teams play, remembers them. More ideas on developing an attitude of contentment and fulfillment for where you are in the organization tomorrow... As a leader, are you finding it difficult to be fulfilled where you are? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Want to Go Places (Part 2)?

Continued from yesterday... There are advantages to being in front or on top of an organization. Here are some additional reasons why leaders like to be “out front”... 3. Leaders in front get to determine the direction: Many believe that the leader in front controls many things within the organization. The truth is, there are many things he cannot control. For example, the only people who have total control in their lives are those that don’t lead anything. They are accountable only to themselves, not others. But this is a fallacy, because everybody leads somebody or something, including themselves. Good leaders get to control mainly two things: direction and timing. Unfortunately, if they aren’t leading well, they can’t even control those two things. 4. Leaders can set the pace: Leaders love progress. It’s one of their primary motivations. As a leader, you probably love moving forward, and the faster, the better. But that can also work against you. If you are running so far ahead that your people can’t follow, then your organization won’t succeed. Achievers (like me) often cross the finish line first, but leaders rarely do. A good leader’s success comes from bringing others across the finish line with them. Unfortunately, the journey with others is slower than the journey alone. That’s true in every area of life where you are trying to lead. A trip to the grocery store is much faster when you go alone than when you take your children. A business trip with colleagues is never as fast as one by yourself (e.g., It can take 30 minutes just to get everyone to agree on a place to eat!). As a leader, you may be able to model the behavior you desire in others, but you will not be able to go as quickly as you want. The only people who may fight for progress the way you do, and want to move quickly, will probably be other good leaders. 5. Leaders enjoy being in on the action: Because leaders like to make things happen, they always enjoy being where the action is. But many times that is not at the top or in front of an organization. Major decisions are made in those places, but usually the action really occurs in the middle of the organization. That’s where most of the exciting activity is. As a leader, are you finding it difficult to be fulfilled where you are? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Want To Go Places?

Wherever people find themselves in life, they usual possess a natural desire to move up. They typically want greater recognition. They may want to make more money. They may want to live in a better home. They probably want to improve and advance. Leaders are no different. They generally want to move up rather than stay put. They want to make a greater impact. They want to be at the front of the pack or the top of an organization, especially early in their lives and careers. But is being out in front really all that it’s cracked up to be? There are advantages to being in front or on top of an organization. But the same things that can benefit leaders can also make leadership difficult. It is almost always a double-edged sword, and anyone who sees only the positives without recognizing the negatives is either naïve or inexperienced. Here are some reasons why leaders like to be “out front”... 1. The front is the most recognized position for a leader: Everyone enjoys praise and recognition. It has been said, “If each of us were to confess his/her most secret desire, the one that inspires all his/her plans and actions, s/he would say, ‘I want to be praised.’” And since leaders, who are the most visible, often receive the credit when a job is well done, many people desire to become leaders. But recognition isn't always what it is cracked up to be. When things go wrong, the person recognized as responsible is also the leader. When a football team has a losing season, the coach gets the blame. When a baseball team keeps losing games, the manager gets fired. When the big account doesn’t sign on with the company, the person leading the effort is held responsible. Being in front can be good for your ego, but it can also cost you your job. 2. The view is better from the front: A newscaster once conducted an interview with an accomplished mountain climber. The journalist asked, “Why do you climb mountains? The mountain climber looked at the newsman and replied, “It’s obvious that you’ve never been to the top of a mountain.” The view from the top of a mountain is incredible – it’s thrilling. The perspective is uniquely amazing, especially if it can only be reached by climbing. Similarly, it’s often hard to read the “organizational scoreboard” from the middle of the pack. It’s much easier to see it when you are at the top of the organization. There is a perspective one has from the front (aka, the top) of an organization that cannot be had from anywhere else. But with that perspective comes responsibility. If you see problems that can threaten to derail the organization, harm employees, or cheat customers, you have a responsibility to try to resolve them – no matter how messy, costly, or difficult it is. Leaders at the front don’t have the freedom to neglect what their position allows them to see. As a leader, are you finding it difficult to be fulfilled where you are? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

All Leaders Have Ego (Part 2)

The fact that leaders in the middle of the organization are often hidden – and as a result they often don’t get the credit or recognition they deserve – can be a real ego buster. The challenge is to be a team player and remain content while contributing. Continued yesterday, here are some additional tips for doing that... 3. Find satisfaction in knowing the real reason for the success of a project: In his book, Good to Great, author Jim Collins writes about “level 5” leaders. These leaders usually led their organizations quietly and humbly. They were much more effective than the flashy, charismatic, high-profile leaders. One of the reasons that’s true is that these leaders understood that they didn’t really deserve all the credit for the success of their organization. The success came mainly from the people who got the work done – especially the leaders in the middle of the organization. When you do a job well, and you know the impact of the work that you did, that should give you great satisfaction and should motivate you. When you know you’re making a significant contribution, you need less external motivation. The definition of high morale is: “I make a difference.” 4. Embrace the compliments of others in the middle of the pack: There is no higher compliment than acknowledgement and appreciation from someone whose circumstances, position, or experience is similar to yours. A musician may enjoy a compliment from a fan, but praise from another accomplished musician means more. When an entrepreneur says someone is good at spotting an opportunity, you believe him/her. Likewise, when someone else who is leading from the middle of the organization tells you, “Well done,” you should take it to heart. Novelist Mark Twain once said, “One compliment can keep me going for a whole month.” Everyone enjoys kind word from the boss, and many seek them out. But the praise of a colleague who’s walked in your shoes really does mean more. 5. Understand the difference between self-promotion and selfless promotion: Sir Isaac Newton discovered the laws of gravity in the 1600s. When he introduced those laws to the scientific world, it revolutionized astronomical studies. But if it weren’t for Edmund Halley, Newton would not have been recognized as a great scientist. Halley was a sounding board for Newton’s ideas, he challenged Newton’s assumptions, he corrected Newton’s mathematical calculations, and he even drafted geometric diagrams to support Newton’s work. When Newton was hesitant to publish his ideas, Halley first convinced him to write the manuscript, then edited it and supervised its publication. Halley even financed the printing of it. The final work, Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy, made Newton one of the most highly regarded thinkers in history. Halley understood the difference between self-promotion and selfless promotion. It was more important to him to see Newton’s ideas shared than to receive personal recognition for helping him. He knew how important those ideas were, and he wanted to get them out into the world. That’s what people do who understand selfless promotion. Self-promotion says, “If you don’t toot your own horn, no one else will toot it for you.” Selfless promotion says, “I just want to help the team make beautiful music!” Tim Sanders, author of Love is the Killer App, talks about the abundance mind-set. This was an idea promoted by Stephen Covey over a decade earlier. It states that there are plenty of resources, credit, and opportunities to go around. In fact, it is a scarcity mind-set that is at the root of most conflict. Leaders that excel in the middle of the pack have an abundance mind-set. And if you lead well from the middle of an organization, you won’t stay there forever. Good leadership always gets noticed. Are you struggling to be fulfilled with the limited recognition you receive? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

All Leaders Have Ego

It is normal for any person to want recognition, and leaders are the same. The fact that leaders in the middle of the organization are often hidden – and as a result they often don’t get the credit or recognition they deserve – can be a real ego buster. The challenge is to be a team player and remain content while contributing. Here are some tips for doing that... 1. Concentrate more on your duties than on your dreams: Leonard Bernstein was once asked which instrument he considered to be the most difficult to play. After a moment he responded, “Second fiddle. I can get plenty of first violinists, but to find one who can play second fiddle with enthusiasm – that’s a problem.” We can often become so focused on our dreams and goals that we lose sight of the responsibilities right in front of us. Effective leaders pay more attention to production than to promotion. They focus on delivering the goods. If you consistently deliver the goods, you will be noticed. And more importantly, you will be content with the job you do even at those times when others don’t recognize your efforts. 2. Appreciate the value of your position: Not everyone will understand or appreciate the work you do. So it’s important that you do. A cute anecdote illustrates this principle well: A beaver and a rabbit were once having a conversation in front of Hoover Dam. As they started up at the immense wall of the dam, the beaver said to the rabbit, “No, I didn’t actually build it myself. But it was based upon an idea of mine.” Every position has value, but all too often we don’t value that position. You make a position important by valuing it. If we despise the position we have, it may be because of “destination disease,” which some also call the ‘greener grass syndrome.’ If we focus on being some other place because we think it’s better, then we will neither enjoy where we are nor do what we must do to succeed. Are you struggling to be fulfilled with the limited recognition you receive? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Middle Managers Wear Many Hats (Part 2)

Continued from yesterday... Being in the middle of an organization is a lot like being the middle child in a family. These leaders have to learn to get along with everybody around them and survive the various family dynamics: following, leading, cajoling, appeasing, and partnering as needed. It’s not an easy task. Here are a few guidelines: 3. When you change hats, don’t change your personality: This is harder than it sounds. As stated earlier, you shouldn’t treat your spouse the same way you treat you employees. That doesn’t mean, however, that you should change your personality according to who you’re with. Your attitude and behavior should be consistent and predictable. Otherwise, you won’t be trustworthy in the eyes of those you work with. 4. Don’t neglect any hat you are responsible to wear: If you neglect the duties of any hat for a day, you will fall behind. The physical separation of different areas of responsibility may help you make the mental leap you need to keep all your responsibilities moving forward, neglecting none. Whenever possible, leave work at the office and vice versa. If you are being asked to wear many hats by people in your life, then you must be sure to not neglect any of them. 5. Remain flexible: The main key is knowing what hat to put on at any point in time and enjoying the challenge it offers. The only way to do that is to remain flexible. Because there are so many demands on leaders in the middle of an organization, they can’t afford to be rigid. They need to be able to change hats at a moment’s notice. Some people love a new challenge and thrive on the rapidly changing demands and nature of leadership in the middle of an organization. It energizes them. Others find it less appealing. But it’s something that all great leaders must learn to navigate if they want to be successful and influence others from wherever they are in the organization. Are you struggling to know which hat to wear and when? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Middle Managers Wear Many Hats (Part 1)

Being in the middle of an organization is a lot like being the middle child in a family. These leaders have to learn to get along with everybody around them and survive the various family dynamics: following, leading, cajoling, appeasing, and partnering as needed. It’s not an easy task. So what are the leaders in the middle of an organization to do when they are required to wear many hats but have only one head? Here are a few guidelines: 1. Remember that the hat sets the context when interacting with others. Every role or hat you are asked to wear has its own responsibilities and objectives. If you change hats, keep in mind that the context changes. You wouldn’t interact in the same way with your spouse, your children, your boss, and your employees, would you? The goal often determines the role and the approach to take. 2. Don’t use one hat to accomplish a task required for another hat. Consider an executive assistant. They constantly attend meetings for their boss when he is out of town. They do so that they can keep their boss up to date on strategy and important changes that are occurring. When working in that capacity, they have to be careful not to abuse their communication link to get their own way. They must be careful when to claim they are “speaking for the boss.” Their words carry great weight. Likewise, after they attend a meeting and are filling their boss in on what happened, they must be careful to represent the opinions of the people in the meeting fairly and accurately. They have to be an expert in knowing what hat to where in any given situation, and they may be required to change hats in an instant. They have a very powerful position, but they never use one hat to accomplish the tasks that may be required in another capacity. They must take the time to cultivate each working relationship on its own term, and act accordingly. It’s often a balancing act. To be continued... Are you struggling to know which hat to wear and when? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Dealing with Incompetent and Ineffective Leaders (part 2)

A normal reaction to working under an incompetent and/or ineffective leader is to try to fix or replace the leader you’re working for, but that is usually not an option for leaders in the middle of the organization. It may not be easy, but it is possible to survive – and even flourish in a situation like this. Continued from yesterday, here are some additional recommendations: 4. Get Permission to Develop a Game Plan to Complement Your Leader’s Weaknesses: Besides leveraging your strengths, one of the other secrets to job success is to staff up for your weaknesses. As a leader, you would be wise to empower some people who work for you to fill in your talent gaps. For example, if you are not good at details, then hire someone who is and have them work closely with you. You can play that same gap-filling role with your leader. You must be very careful, however, in the way you approach this subject. Don’t offer your opinion on her weaknesses unless she asks, and even then, be tactful. If she identifies one of her weaknesses to you, privately ask if she would be willing to let you carry the ball in that area. The idea is to do what she can’t do so that she can do what she does best. 5. Expose Your Leader to Good Leadership Resources: If you are working to improve your leadership skills, then you’ve probably discovered many good leadership resources, such as books, CDs, DVDs, etc. Share those with your leader. Once again, the approach you take is very important. Rather than saying, “Boy, do you need this!” say something like, "I just got through with this book, and I thought you might enjoy it too.” Or, if you find some kind of connection or hook that you might think appeals to him, say, “I was reading this wonderful book, and I thought of you; the author and you have similar backgrounds. I think you might like it.” And then give him a copy of his own. If that resource is well received, you might try periodically following it up with others. 6. Publicly Affirm Your Leader: Some people fear that if they say positive things about an ineffective leader they work for, they will be misleading others. Or they worry that others will think they have poor judgment. But other people are aware of an ineffective leader’s limitations, and as long as your affirmation is truthful and focuses on your leader’s strengths, it won’t reflect badly on you. In fact, it will engender others’ respect. Your affirmation for your leader will help him develop confidence, not only in himself but also in you. Are you struggling under an ineffective and/or incompetent leader? Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/

Dealing with Incompetent and Ineffective Leaders (part 1)

A normal reaction to dealing with incompetent and/or ineffective leaders is to fix or replace the leader you’re working for, but that is usually not an option for leaders in the middle of the organization. But even if it were, it would be inappropriate. No matter what the circumstance, our limitation isn’t the leader above us – it’s the spirit within us. Remember your leadership is more about your disposition than your position. The role of leaders in the middle of an organization – in nearly every circumstance – is to add value to the organization and to the leader. The only time that is not true is when the leader above you is unethical or criminal. So what you do when you find yourself following a leader who is incompetent and/or ineffective? How do you add value in such a circumstance? Most good leaders have had to ask themselves those questions at some time in their lives. In fact, the stronger you are as a leader, the more likely you are to face a situation where you can lead more effectively than the person to whom you report. It may not be easy, but it is possible to survive – and even flourish in a situation like this. Here are some recommendations... 1. Develop a Solid Relationship with Your Leader: The first reaction to working with an ineffective leader is often to withdraw from him of her and build relational barriers. Fight that urge. If you make your leader your adversary, you will create a no-win situation. Instead, build a relational bridge. Try to get to know him/her. Find common ground. Build a solid professional relationship. And in the process, reaffirm your commitment to the mission of the organization. Doing those things will put you on the same team. 2. Identify & Appreciate Your Leader’s Strengths: Everybody has strengths – even an incompetent and/or ineffective leader. Work to find them in the person you work for. It may not be easy. Maybe his/her strengths aren’t qualities you value or admire. That doesn’t matter. Find them, and then think about how they might be assets to the organization. 3. Commit Yourself to Adding Value to Your Leader’s Strengths: The pathway to success in your career lies in maximizing your strengths. That is also true for your leader. Once you have discerned what your leader’s strengths are and how those characteristics can be an asset to the organization, look for ways to help leverage those strengths. This list of ideas on how to deal with incompetent and/or ineffective leaders will be continued tomorrow. In the meantime, if you are Are you struggling under an ineffective and/or incompetent leader Truth@Life can help. Call 248-396-6255 or email me at curtis.songer@gmail.com for a FREE consultation. For more info on help I can provide check out http://truthatlife.com/